Sometimes You Don’t Need A JD To Understand The Law

LOS ANGELES, June 8 — A sobbing, shouting Paris Hilton was led from the courtroom Friday and ordered by a judge to return to jail to serve out the remainder of her 45-day sentence.

“It’s not right,” yelled Hilton, rising from her seat at the defendant’s table.

“Mom! Mom! Mom!” she cried out to her mother, Kathy, who collapsed in tears in the front row of the courtroom  …. read the rest of this crybaby debacle of the rich girl with a lousy lawyer.

Well, maybe I shouldn’t be so harsh on Ms. Hilton’s attorney, Mr. Hutton … the son of  a gun might sure me, eh?  But I can say this … the entire Paris Hilton Drunk Driving situation has become a mockery of the US justice system.  But it does give me something interesting to post about regarding how to win a court case … any court case … and, as you might guess, warms the cockles of my cold little heart when I saw one of the world’s most notorious spoiled brats on her way to jail one more time. driving under the influence and other motor vehicle violations

Regular readers know I write mainly about divorce cases and specifically the valuation of assets for divorce … CSRS, FERS, Military Pensions and all the rest of the alphabet soup.  But a large part of my lawyer associates work is “fixing” problems caused by attorneys who don’t really know what they are doing with these alphabetical nightmares.  That’s why I always caution readers to make sure they get an attorney who actually knows what she/he is doing … not just the one who presents the best image around town.

I don’t know Ms. Hilton’s attorney but he must present  a pretty slick image, because he certainly doesn’t know much about dealing with a court on what could be a relatively simple case of mainly motor vehicle violations.  Of course, in all fairness, the first thing that has made this case so complicated is Paris and her big mouth.

  • If you get arrested, shut up and phone your attorney.
  • Do not go on radio or TV and tell the world how the offence meant nothing
  • If you do have to go to court … drag your ass in there on time …. no matter how rich you are

But as far as an attorney goes?  If I was Paris I would be making a change. 

  • Mr. Hutton promised the judge information that would show Paris’ alleged medical condition … he didn’t produce it.  Strike One.
  • Mr. Hutton told the presiding judge that the judge’s court did not have precedence over the administrative actions of the sheriff.  Duh’oh!  If you want to lose any action you have pending, just be sure to insult the judge and his court .. especially when your point of law is WRONG.
  • Mr. Hutton, as the family legal adviser need to be able to control his client and especially her mollycoddling mother.  Even if Paris hadn’t been so stupid as to get herself into this current mess, with a mouth like Paris’ mom anyone can get into deeper trouble.  I’ve seen people hauled off for contempt for less than Mrs. Hilton’s outbursts, so if you can’t control yourself, stay out of the court room.

If you find yourself heading off to court … for any reason, just remember that the court is majestic.  The judge has near total control over the cases brought before him.  99.9% of our judges in the US are honorable, intelligent and fair … but very few take kindly to lawyers, defendants and defendant’s mothers who thumb their noses at the institution of the law.

As for Sheriff Baca?   Oh well, that’s a post for a whole different day.


  1. Wow, I remember when that happened. I was taught at a young age to respect the courtroom, the Judge and the system. Rich celebs that act this way need a major reality check and it sounds like Ms. Hilton did.

    • Justin Mazza ยป Yes, that’s a recycled article of mine. It’s annoying to some to have these older articles pop up, but on the other hand, if I dont rotate them into the front every so often, some people may never see them. I’m an American but I live in the Philippines (for many reasons, especially financial and tax-related). The number one complaint many have about the Philippines … even some Filipinos … is that there is a significant amount of corruption and ‘back-room’ dealing, perhaps even in the judicial system.

      Many times the folks pointing out the errant activites do so from a position of national/racial superiority. “That sort of stuff never happens in a first world country like the USA”.

      Well, yes they do. We Americans tend to ignore what goes on in our own country while we spend our days telling others what’s wrong with their country. Interesting, at any rate, what a box of cigars can do …

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